mgpcpastor's blog

So, I turned twenty the month before Margaret and I married in 1983.
I think it’s fair to say that the majority consensus among thinking people was that I was an immature idiot of most uncertain means, and Margaret was out of her mind for risking her future happiness on me.
Personally speaking, I can concede that majority consensus had a point. Possibly many of them still hold that opinion, it wouldn’t surprise me.
Albert Mohler interacts with an op-ed column ‘Did I Get Married Too Young?’ written by David Lapp and published in the online version of the Wall Street Journal.
Lapp deals with issues such as: what is early marriage; money and personal development.
Mohler’s piece ‘Did He Get Married Too Young’ pretty much endorses Lapp’s observations. (Disclaimer: like myself and Lapp, Mohler married young.)
Furthermore, Mohler believes the trend to marriage in the late twenties and early thirties is evidence of “the twin phenomena of delayed adulthood and extended adolescence” both of which carry their own problems.

The question is not: ‘how old are you?’, the question is ‘Do you understand, and are you prepared and able to make and keep this life-long covenant?’
My own failings in this area have recently been much on my mind.
Margaret and I fell into marriage. There was no distinct parental input on my side, and I think it was moderately better for Margaret. The majority of what to do and not do was passively observed.
I think we had one meeting beforehand with out pastor, to go through the Service. (A godly man of reformed evangelical convictions.)
No counseling, no courses. We never read a book.
We’ve learned by trial and error (God’s grace and what for want of a theologically correct term I’ll call ‘dumb luck’), and the danger of this is that you think everyone else will get by the same way.
These thoughts weigh heavily on my mind in these weeks.
The imperative for intentionality in every relationship in life (spouse, children, family, friends, church community) pretty much overwhelms me in its challenge, complexity and open-endedness.
For myself, solitude is bliss, interaction an effort.
Thanks be to God who enables us to do all things.